When Cupid Strikes inside the Cubicle

No one ever knows when cupid will aim his arrow in their direction. As hard as it for people to meet potential mates, as well as the long hours that more and more people are putting in at the workplace, it is not surprising that office romances continue to blossom. While love is always a good thing for the two people cupid decided to bring together at the water cooler, it is often a headache for Human Resources professionals.

How do offices deal with romances between employees and what do experts say employers need to do in such situations? It is important for employers to examine this trend and decide on courses of action.

In The End ...

When cupid’s arrow strikes inside the cubicle that employees spend the vast majority of days and nights in, human resources and management needs to be ready with a set of guidelines that can handle the consequences that result from cupid’s office interference.

What the EXPERTS Say

Quote 1: "Long work days often mean missed social opportunities for many professional singles." "Since Match.Com's members tend to be college educated professionals, it isn't surprising that some of them first find us during a break while they are in the workplace, where they are likely to turn to the Internet to get things done in their personal lives." --Trish McDermott, Vice President of Romance at Match.Com.

Quote 2: "When you think about it, dates are really an artificial situation compared to growing and learning with someone on the job." "At the office, you see a whole side of people that you don't see if you just go out on a date. It's a true test of character." --Gail Jern, Westaff Human Resources Manager

Quote 3: "Colleagues who are dating should find out what the company policies are on workplace romance so they can avoid potential negative consequences." "Although they may not lose their jobs, employees involved in office romances could be viewed as unprofessional, especially if they are public in their displays of affection." --Tony Lee, editor in chief and general manager of CareerJournal.com.

Quote 4: "It’s a fine line between an employee’s right to free association and privacy, and an employer’s legitimate business concerns." --Alice DeTora, an attorney

Quote 5: "We share clients and work closely together. It's a benefit to clients." --Teresa Butler Stivarius, an employment lawyer

Quote 6: "Office romances are fact of life. We are human beings, and we spend too much time in the office. In my view, the office is a great place for singles to meet other single people."
--Survey Respondent

Quote 7: "It would behoove companies to have a clear policy as to how far they will tolerate workplace romance." "It's unrealistic to regulate away workplace romance." --Mark Oldman, co-founder of the Vault

An article by Joanna L. Krotz titled "5 Rules for On-The-Job Romance" that appeared on Microsoft.Com listed possible rules that employers could implement in the workplace to deal with possible problems that may arise from the coupling of employees.

The rules include:

1. Brake for unequal status, and take action. "There's an inherent imbalance of power when a supervisor and a subordinate are involved," says Teresa Butler Stivarius, an Atlanta-based employment lawyer at Epstein Becker & Green. What to do when the relationship between a boss and an employee ends? "Remove the supervision," Stivarius says. Also, when the relationship begins, ask each partner to sign a statement saying the relationship is consensual and they agree to the policies you've set up.

2. Watch out for favoritism. Avoid any appearance of sex for favors, potentially a legally liable situation.

3. Short-circuit inappropriate behavior. Setting ground rules for romantically involved employees is the first step, says Arlene Vernon, a human resources consultant in Eden Prairie, Minn.

4. Avoid high school reruns. When employees breakup curb office gossip

5. Make your number 1 priority the customer and suppliers. If they are not comfortable with the work environment, make changes.

The Numbers

- According to a 2005 Office Romance Survey conducted by Vault, Inc., 58% of employees say they have been involved in an office romance, up 12% from the results from two years ago

- According to a 2002 workplace romance survey conducted jointly by the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) and Career Journal.com, 75% of HR professionals and 59% of executives said their organizations did not have a policy on workplace romance.


- 81% of HR professionals and 76% of executives said that workplace romances were dangerous.


- According to 2004 statistics compiled by the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) that represented the number of charges of sexual harassment that were made and resolved in the work place, 13,136 claims were made that year. Due to the13,136 claims of sexual harassment made that year, companies across the country had to shell out monetary benefits in the combined total of $37.1 million.


- The SHRM study also found that only 12 percent of the surveyed organizations provided training to managers and supervisors about how to manage a workplace romance.